Brands Have Stopped Selling Solutions and Started Selling Validation

A few weeks ago I fell down a YouTube rabbit hole of old TV commercials from the 70s, 80s, and 90s…the kind I grew up with. In those days, the formula was different -

• Head & Shoulders warned you about the social consequences of dandruff.

• Slim-Fast promising you’d finally fit into those jeans.

• Listerine reminding you, with some urgency, that your breath was a problem.

It was a little cringeworthy. But it also made me notice something. Those ads shared a common assumption: that you had room to improve, and that their product could help you do it. The message was blunt, even harsh at times. But it was at least honest about the transaction.

Now compare that to what you see today. Brands don’t fix you anymore. They validate you. And I’ve been trying to figure out when exactly that changed and what that change means.

The Timing Isn’t Coincidental

The shift happened right around the time when social media stopped being a novelty and became a staple of communication and identity formation.

Jonathan Haidt’s work has a lot to say about this. Haidt points out that social media platforms made critical changes during this period: the Like button, the retweet function, algorithmic feeds designed to maximize engagement. These features created something new: a validation economy where every post is measured in likes, every share is social proof, and your feed becomes an echo chamber affirming your worldview.

In The Coddling of the American Mind, Haidt identifies one of the “Great Untruths” that emerged from this era: “Always trust your feelings.” The idea that your emotional reactions are inherently valid, and if something makes you uncomfortable, the thing is wrong, not your reaction to it.

If that sounds familiar, it’s because that’s exactly the message modern advertising runs on.

The Connection

Social media trained us to expect validation, not criticism. It taught us that our authentic self is inherently more valuable and that discomfort is evidence of external problems, not opportunities for growth.

Brands noticed and they pivoted.

The old model of “you need fixing” suddenly felt like an attack on authentic identity. So advertising shifted to speak the language of social media: You’re perfect. The world needs changing. Support a brand that understands this.

It’s not that brands suddenly got more enlightened. They just followed the culture to where it was going.

What It Means

I’m not saying the old model was better. It definitely exploited insecurities. But there’s something worth sitting with here. The old approach at least assumed people could improve and grow. The new one assumes you’re already perfect and that any suggestion to the contrary is an aggression.

When every institution from social media to corporate marketing reinforces that message, it’s worth asking what space is left for the uncomfortable work of self-examination. Not because brands owe us that (they don’t) but because it’s easy to not notice when the culture quietly stops expecting it of us.

Haidt’s research suggests we might already be seeing some of the effects: rising anxiety, increasing polarization, difficulty handling criticism. Advertising didn’t cause these things. But it may be reflecting them in ways worth paying attention to.

I don’t have a tidy conclusion here. Just the feeling, watching those old commercials, that something changed…and that it’s worth closer consideration.